Summer Killer
by TCBN
Summary: It's summer vacation and the four boys plus Bebe, Wendy and two OC's (Alex and Sam) have gone to the sunny beach side for a month for spring break. What they don't know, is that there's a killer on the loose who wants to kill them all. One by one, each one drops dead... will anyone survive? (str8 pairings) WendyXStan, KyleXoc BebeXkenny
1. One: prologue

Somewhere in the USA, there was a town that was known for it's beachside lifestyle and beer. The roads were forever covered with sand and tourists sporting sarongs or teenagers with a mean hangover. The icy cold ocean was always littered with screaming children and laughing adults. Welcome to the sandy sleepy town that caused everyone to break a sweat in the sweltering heat every day. A minibus groaned along the road, two people in the bus full of teenagers were arguing loudly.

"God you're squashing me!" Kyle grunted, shifting on the hot leather seat

"Ah fuck off" Cartman shoved Kyle, "I don't have space!"

"Maybe if you weren't so fucking FAT, we'd all fit in the car!" Kyle retorted

"Shut up!" Sam shouted from the driver's seat, "I can't hear myself think!"

"God, we landed thirty minutes ago and you're arguing NOW!?" Stan moaned

"Fucking fat fuck!" Kyle swore, shoving Cartman

"Bebe, I have a question" Kenny asked, at the back of the bus

"I don't want to play your game, it's gross" Bebe sighed, looking out the window

"Please? One more round" Kenny begged

"Fine" Bebe didn't look at Kenny

"Would you rather have a puss filled pimple the size of the grapefruit on your face" Kenny grinned, "Or have spiders crawling out of your-"

"I forfeit" Bebe reddened

"I didn't even get to the best part!" Kenny whined

"Please, no more" Bebe dry gagged

"You are so gross" Wendy said, on the other side of Kenny, "No wonder you can't pick up chicks"

"At least I SCREWED more than you" Kenny retorted

"I wouldn't be proud" Wendy murmured

"Hmph!" Kenny snorted

"And jerking doesn't count" Wendy spat, "leave my friend alone"

"It so does!" Kenny laughed

"Hey, go fuck yourself!" Wendy barked

"I would love to fuck myself but I am sure no one wants to see that" Kenny laughed.

Alex, sitting at the front passenger seat stared out the window, not entirely sure how the entire bus had started arguing with each other.

"I wonder how long the month long summer vacation will last" Alex muttered

"We just need to make sure no one kills each other" Sam laughed

"Don't jinx the holiday" Alex laughed

Just at that moment, a newspaper article slammed onto the windscreen, causing Sam to slam the breaks as he swiped the paper off the screen to read.

_Sunshine coast's murderer has struck again! Please be careful especially at night! _

Alex read over his shoulder. A car hooted at them, causing Sam to throw the paper out the window and whizz off to their hotel.

"You think it's around here?" Alex quietly asked

"Nothing bad will happen" Sam assured, "we're responsible people"

"Too RIGHT!" Kenny ripped open a bag, releasing about fifty packets of condoms into the car.

"Dude" Stan stared, "Not cool"


	2. Two

The teenagers unloaded the car of luggage, booze and cash. They rolled their way into the hotel foyer, where an old man with a massive cigar between two fingers sat and puffed smoke.

"Hi" Stan greeted, "We're here for the month"

"By the looks of how many people your party is, you need the floor" the man said

"We do?" Stan looked over his shoulder, "I guess we do, sir"

"I should warn you" the man lifted out a box of keys, "There's a murderer around"

"Oh" Stan took the box, "We'll be careful"

"I tell you this, if they ever catch the killer, I promise you a free round of booze down at the bar" the man said, blowing smoke in his face

"Thank you" Stan walked over to his friends and handed out keys

"I'm about ready for the beach" Wendy wiped sweat off her forehead

Everyone jeered at this and went to their rooms to get changed into beach gear.

On the golden sandy beach, everyone lay on the sand, some occasionally dunked in the cold water. Alex had on a pair of aviator sunglasses, perches on her shoulders, she watched the guys with a soccer ball. Bebe fussed over her sunburn that had already taken place and Wendy bitched about the school.

"Apparently there's a murderer nearby" Alex whispered to them

"He's probably after those who cheated on him" Bebe shrugged

"Really, Bebe!?" Wendy scoffed, "God you are so fucking _daft_"

"It could be a _she_" Alex pointed out, taking a swig from a beer she plucked from a cooler.

"What? I can _guess_" Bebe snorted, taking a beer

"Two year old boy murdered" Wendy said off the top of her head, "Locals think two year old had affair with sixy f-"

The soccer ball smacked Wendy on the head, cutting her off and causing her sunglasses to go flying.

"Thank you for getting rid of depressing" Alex laughed as Kyle saluted them

Wendy threw the ball over to them and glared at the duo.

"I wouldn't be so fucking _angry_" Bebe snapped, "YOU suggested the idea and a newspaper article scares you?"

"We're a big crowd" Alex stood, "Eight able bodied people against one"

"Ey, fatass!" Kenny danced about, "You can't catch me!"

"Get back here you poor, poverty stricken piece of third world crap!" Cartman roared

"That's a new insult!" Stan laughed, diving to kick the ball away from Kenny

"And the referee says that's a foul!" Kyle shouted, watching Stan pick it up and peg it at the wild ocean, way over Sam's head and waving arms

"You missed!" Sam shouted, "You can't even throw a _ball _You call yourself a quarterback!?"

They started to crack up as Stan flipped Sam off.

"I can only kick soccer balls and throw foot balls!" Stan screamed, "Now we lost the ball!"

"I'll get the ball" Kyle sighed, diving for the water.

"Don't lose your _own_ balls while you're at it!" Cartman jeered only to get whacked on the head by an irritated Stan nearby.

Kyle swiftly swam for the bobbing ball, one stroke at a time. The laughter and noise from the sand grew softer as he grew closer to the ball.

"Jesus, Stan pegged the ball far" Kyle muttered, grabbing it

Kyle froze, still. A sense of fear came over him as if he was being watched. The paranoia of being grabbed by the ankle and dragged to a watery death played on his mind. This was a happy place, Kyle thought, no one would hurt him. The fear of a shark or someone jumping on him from a helicopter prompted him to swim back to land, passing the sodden ball to Sam.

"Hey, dude!" Sam tossed the ball to Cartman who grappled at the air, fell on his face and swore, the ball sailing past his legs.

"God fucking DAMMIT!" Cartman swore, "I can't even play catch!"

"Dude, you can't even do the sobriety test properly you're so fat!" Kyle laughed, "Try walk in a straight line"

"Ha fucking ha!" Cartman smacked the ball in Kyle's face, causing him to scream in agony, sporting a bloody nose.

"Jesus, dude!" Stan swore, looking at his best friend clutch his nose in pain

"We thought we'd join in but it looks pretty violent" Alex laughed, walking up to them, Bebe in tow.

"Oh you want to play rough!?" Sam teased, tackling Alex to the sand, "then play!"

"Ah!" Alex dropped the beer, laughing

"Free booze!" Stan picked up the beer and downed it

"Another game!" Kyle shouted, wiping blood from his nose

"Really? With a nose bleed?" Bebe blinked, getting ready for showdown

"A bloody nose isn't going to stop _me_ from playing!" Kyle laughed

"C'mon!" Bebe yanked the ball from the ground, pegging it

Everyone resumed playing, laughing, kicking and diving for the football and drinking booze. What they didn't realize was someone wasn't there.

Wendy flushed the toilet, shaking the sand from her hair. She was just about to walk out the bathroom when someone grabbed her by the leg, pulling her over, causing her to fall on her face.

"Hello, there" the voice smiled, quickly handcuffing the screaming girl

"Let go of me!" Wendy frantically kicked

"I'm afraid that won't be happening anytime soon" the figure laughed, yanking her up and forcing her against a stained wall. The figure slowly brought out a knife from a pocket and placed it on her neck, free hand gripping her head and using his body to trap and straddle her to the wall.

"Any last words, sweet cheeks?" he cooed

"I don't have any, I'm not going to-" Wendy started to cough and splutter blood. The blade sank into her throat, causing blood to spray out her neck. She started to falter, groaning and gagging. The killer sawed at her neck, smiling, staring into her frantic eyes while laughing.

"He-lp!" Wendy choked, shaking, face turning white.

"I'm afraid nobody can hear ya" he laughed, rearing the knife up, "Lights out"

She fell to the ground, limp, as the man sat over her and brought the knife into her chest and ripped chunks of flesh out. Repeatedly stabbing, he laughed.

Sam lay splayed out on a towel with a headache from too much booze threatening to make him vomit if he moved. Stan was eating from a bag of Doritos; listening to Kenny talk animatedly about the day he stole towels from the girl's bathrooms at camp. Alex and Bebe would occasionally scoff or blush at the risqué parts. Kyle was holding a towel to his nose to stave the bleeding from his nose. Cartman was farting every single time Kenny said the word _boner_ causing everyone to laugh, Kenny still wasn't sure why Cartman was so gassy and why it was on par with the specific word.

"Hey Kenny" Kyle interrupted him

"No, I did remember to cover my tracks" Kenny laughed

"Ah. Where's Wendy?" Kyle asked, looking around

"Dunno" Kenny shrugged

"She said she had to pee" Bebe shrugged, looking at her watch, "two hours ago"

"What?" Alex stared, her drunken mind not processing

They all stood up, Kenny's laughing expression even slid off his face. Sam slowly sat up, hand to his head.

"We should all go, it's late and it's on the way back to the hotel" Sam said

They collected their things, and made for the bathrooms.

Stan was shaking horribly, face ashen, his hands tenderly touching the broken body on the floor. Everyone was horrified, standing there with white faces.

"Wendy" Stan croaked, "No…"

Kyle slowly knelt beside Stan, placed a hand on his shoulder.

"Wendy" Stan started to cry, head bowed over his long time girlfriend

"Aw fuck, the bitch got it bad" Carman murmured

"Shut up" Alex sniffed, covering her face.

Wendy was dead; her eyes wide open, staring blankly at the ceiling, mouth agape, as if screaming. Wendy had gashes spread all over her body, including her face, chest and neck.

_The murderer of Sunshine coast has struck again! Twenty-something year old woman murdered in school bathroom, body found by her group of friends!_

**…**


	3. Three

They sat beside the pool, waiting for the restaurant to open its doors for dinner. Some people were badly shaken; others were just blankly staring at the sky, lying down.

"Ugh, I need to clear my head" Bebe stood up, "I need to be alone"

"I don't think that's a good idea" Sam answered, looking up from his feet

"It's within a hotel" Bebe cocked an eyebrow, "where we have security gaurds roaming the place. They'll cop anyone with a pistol or a knife"

"Just be carful" Alex said, ignoring Bebe's eye roll

"Do you want me to come with you?" Sam asked

"No, I don't need someone to beat the living shit out of someone who remotely looks like a killer" Bebe walked off

"I won't" Sam stifled laughter at her remark

"I need to be alone" Bebe turned the corner

Bebe walked into the rooms, asked for a towel from the desk and walked to the sauna room, discarding her modesty at the door. Nobody took a sauna at 8pm. Stepping into the frying hot steam she sighed in relief. The smoke was so thick that the smoke would even serve, as modesty of someone was to walk in. It was that smoke that blinded her from seeing a figure walk to the sauna door and threaded a crowbar through the handle slowly and quietly. Bebe was lost in her thoughts, thinking about the child hood memories of her and Wendy, about Wendy's tinkling laugh, about Wendy's hilarious stories and their adventures. Opening her eyes after a while, she felt a little light headed and sleepy. Her head started to hurt. Bebe thought it was her hangover being a dick. Sighing with annoyance, she got up and tried the door. She felt dizzy and couldn't stand straight.

"Somebody!" Bebe rasped, rattling the door, her mind fogging up. She looked out the window and down, seeing a crowbar wedged in the handle, "Shit"

Bebe slowly sat on the floor, mind starting to slow down, she lay her head on the stone floor, and stared at the ceiling, tears rolling down her face. She spotted two words etched into the wood of the ceiling, with an arrow pointing to a vent.

_CARBON MONOXIDE_

Any science genius would scream and run from the two words. But it was far too late for Bebe. She had been in the sauna long enough for her body to shut down due to the toxic fumes taking ahold of her as she closed her eyes for the last time, lungs screaming blue murder as she was unwittingly toxically gassed by a harmless sauna.

The group of friends sat at the table, ordering food from the waitress who smiled as she wrote down the food. After this, they started chatting about other gossip and Wendy.

"Bebe's probably sulking in her bedroom" Kenny rolled his eyes

"Well, her best friend since year one did just die" Alex snapped

"I don't want anyone to harvest my intestines!" Cartman wailed

"Look, as wrong as this sounds, we have to make the most of this month long holiday" Kyle suggested, "All we have to do is be careful"

"Hey, Kenny, why did you buy fifty condoms?" Stan asked

"So me and Bebe could get it on for a month?" Kenny answered

"There's about thirty-one nights in a month" Stan explained as everyone started laughing

"Well, divide fifty by thirty" Kenny said, "That's how many times a night one would screw"

"Thinking about it" Kyle snorted, "That's a lot of sex"

"Isn't that precisely the point?" Kenny laughed

"What if you shared them?" Stan tried

"Nah, maybe after I use them" Kenny quibbled, laughing at their faces of disgust

"Kenny, you're gross" Alex remarked

"I can't wait to unwrap my Christmas present!" Kenny snapped Alex's bra strap

Alex batted his hand off, "stop that, perv!"

"Hey, leave her alone!" Kyle snapped

"I don't get the joke" Cartman looked around

"What I mean" Kenny cleared his throat, "Is that can't wait to UNWRAP EVERYTHING or undress Bebe!"

"Did you jus objectify women as Christmas presents?" Stan asked

"What a very unorthodox group!" the waitress intervened, laying down everyone's dinner.

"Mrs waitress?" Kenny turned to her, "How many times a month do you fuck your significant other?"

Stan swiped the back of Kenny's head, blushing along with everyone else.

"I don't think that's your business" The waitress deadpanned

"Well, have you screwed anyone? Dildos don't count" Kenny said

The waitress scoffed and walked off.

"Old crow" Kenny remarked swiping a chicken leg that levitated off his plate by Cartman's hand.

"But mine's too small!" Cartman whined

"Shut up, fatso" Kyle snapped, "You should loose weight"

"I'm not fat! I'm chubby!" Cartman retorted

Everyone laughed at this.

"Too bad Bebe's missing out an a wonderful dinner" Alex smiled to her friends

"To the future!" Stan raised a wine glass

Everyone raised a glass, clinking each other's glasses.

That night, Kenny wandered into Bebe's bedroom and saw the bathroom light on. Kenny, happy to see his girl was fine, leapt onto the bed, yanked off his pants and struck a pose for a few minutes with a wide smile on his face, waiting for Bebe to emerge. He heard the shower turn on, as to which Kenny shrugged, sat up and reached for a beer bottle in the mini fridge.

"I'm home, sexy!" Kenny sang, "And I think I know how to make you feel better!"

No answer. Kenny started singing the lyrics to _Too Sexy_.

_Too sexy! Too sexy! Too sexy for my shirt! Too sexy! Too sexy! Too sexy! Too sexy for my car!_

Kenny lay back on the bed, beer in hand, "I'm too fucking horny!"

Taking a long swig from the beer, eyes closed, he felt the bed depress as someone sat down on the mattress.

"Hey baby" Kenny opened his eyes, only to see a man slam the bottle down Kenny's throat.

"Ah!" Kenny gagged, grappling his own throat, eyes wide open

The man repeatedly smacked the bottle further down his throat, blood spurted up the bottleneck from his mouth as Kenny wriggled helplessly. The killer smiled mercilessly. The bottle bottom was shoved further into Kenny's throat, snapping his jaws and muffling his screams. Kenny eventually went still.


	4. Four

Alex sat up in bed screamed when someone ran into her room and jumped in bed with her, looking freaked out.  
"Shh! It's Kyle!" Kyle slid under the covers and hugged Alex's trembling figure, his own body trembling just as hard.

"Oh my god!" Alex was crying as she shook, "You gave me such a fright!"

"It's okay now" Kyle whispered, "everything's okay, I'm here"

"I heard choking next door!" Alex sobbed, "It was Kenny's side!"

"I heard it, too" Kyle murmured

"Oh my god" Alex buried her face in Kyle's shoulder, "The killer's after us"

"I think we should check on the others" Kyle moved to get out of bed

"Don't" Alex sat up and pulled Kyle back down with her, "I d- don't want to die alone"

They stayed in bed like that, unsure what to do. Kyle's and Alex's phones tinkled their text message trill.

_Climb out the window! Killer's out your way!_

They scrambled to the window and yanked it open. Luckily they were only on the second floor. The pool was below, shimmering like glass. They both shakily climbed out the window. Alex turned around and screamed, seeing the killer appear behind Kyle, whipping an arm around Kyle to stop him jumping, and holding a knife to his neck.

"Kyle!" Alex quivered, clutching onto him

Kyle grunted, shoving Alex to plummet to the pool below. Alex resurfaced and screamed, watching Kyle choke as he was dragged back into the room, the sound of ripping flesh caused eyes to water. Swimming to the side, she saw Sam, Stan and Cartman frantically wave for her to run.

Alex snatched up the knife from where it fell and bolted for the car where Cartman wedged himself in the driver's seat and a screaming Sam and Stan dived in the cars, screaming for them to hurry up. Once Alex got in, Cartman gunned it down the road.

"Drive, you fat fuck!" Stan screamed, looking around

"I'm trying!" Cartman snapped, flooring the pedal, "We're on a straight road!"

Sam sat in the passenger seat, leaned over and clicked off the headlights.

"We don't want to get-" Sam began only to scream as he got sprayed with blood. Someone had sniped the back of Cartman's head. The minibus started to swerve as the passengers screamed, watching the minibus barrel through a barricade and sail through the air, into wilderness, rolling down a steep bushy terrain, into a river.

The bus was upside-down. Sam groaned, feeling the blood rush to his head, he looked around to see his friends bleeding and bruised. He could hear faint dripping in the car. He couldn't feel his legs for some reason.

"My legs. I can't feel my legs" Sam groaned

"Now isn't the time to quote movies" Stan groaned behind him

"Ugh..." Sam fumbled for his seatbelt, pain shooting up his spine as he moved

"Guys" Alex squeaked, "We need to get out the car"

"I can't move" Sam touched his knees, "Holy fuck I can't move!"

"Does your dick still work?" Stan snapped, trying to kick open the door

Sam flipped Stan off, tears rolling off his head, through his hair, onto the ceiling.

"I can't open the door" Sam croaked

Stan and Alex crawled out the door that Stan had managed to kick open. They crawled to Sam's side and wrestled with the door.

"Just go" Sam sniffed, "Leave me here, please"

"We won't leave you here" Alex said, voice wavering

"Look out!" Sam screamed, voice strained

Stan and Alex turned to the sound of crunching footsteps.

"Just go!" Sam waved a hand, "Just fucking GO!"

Alex and Stan scrambled for the bushes, tripping, falling and sweating. They didn't dare look back until the car was out of their sight.

Sam waited; shivering as shock slowly took ahold of him. He sucked in his breath as he saw two feet appear in front of his window.  
"Where are they?" The killer growled

"I don't know" Sam whispered

"Aw that's a shame" the killer snarled, crouching, "Your gasoline is leaking and I'm sure you would like to be saved. If you tell me where they are, I'll drag you out"  
The killer slowly lit a cigarette and took a long drag.

"Why are you doing this?" Sam croaked, straining to look at him

"Well, since you're life is about to come to an end, may as well give you a bed tme story" he laughed

"How sweet" Sam snapped sarcastically

"Once upon a little town, in the mountains" the killer sat down, "A group of kindergartners were wanting to play with fire"

Sam blinked, "They were pyromaniacs?"

"I was a kindergartner just like them" he smiled, "they asked me to start a fire. They said they'd put it out with their piss"

"Pee is flammable" Sam automatically whispered

"And I'm sent to juvie because of those BRATS!" The killer stood up, lifting up his half used cigarette and flicking it aside.

"The name" The killer smiled, "Is Trent Boyett"

The killer took out his lighter and turned it on, moved out of Sam's sight and threw it at the bus, turning into an angry fireball, raging and scalding. Sam's blood curdling screaming fell on no ears. The melting metal, scouring plastic and thick smoke eventually dampened his pained screaming.

Alex and Stan stared at the black smoke that soared into the sky. The smell of gasoline, flames and flesh caused the duo to gag. They scrambled through the thicket, until they reached a road. Walking along it, they talked and half cried.

"We need to kill this maniac" Stan seethed, wiping tears from his face

"I- I can't believe we were all laughing, discussing what to do on spring break only 24 hours ago" Alex sniffed, "Are you sure we shouldn't just go home?"

"No. we're killing this guy" Stan fisted his hand


	5. Five

They had walked back to the hotel to claim their belongings. Both of them were in a state of shock. There were going to be so many funerals to attend. Police tape was strewn everywhere. Gurneys with dead bodies under white sheets sat near lifts. Alex and Stan silently when to their floor. Alex saw Kyle's signature hair poking out one of the covered gurneys. Tears of lava spilt down her cheeks as she started sobbing uncontrollably.

"This this is a quarantined area, you must leave" an official said, standing in front of the lift. The doors closed and they moved back to the foyer.

"I'm can't believe everyone's dead" Alex sniffed, Stan had drawn his knees to his chest and looked distraught himself.

"We need to fucking kill this guy" Stan fumed

"Why don't we just go home"

"We can't go home" Stan faced Alex, "We need to kill this bastard"

"How would we do that?" Alex muttered

"We're going to catch him" Stan announced, "Lure him out"

At dusk, Stan shivered as he stood at the look out. From this height, you could see the entire town, the long strip of the beach. Stan was planning on killing the killer himself. The killer approached hm.

"Hello, what are you doing all alone, here?" Trent grinned, pulling out his gun

"Oh my god! It's you?" Stan stared, "all this time? You're seeking revenge?"

"That's right! I would keep killing all the way until I got my hands on you four" Trent snarled

"Why did you kill Sam? He had nothing to do with it!" Stan snapped, terrified

"Witnesses don't live" Trent cocked his gun, staring,

Alex appeared, screaming, "don't hurt him!"

"Fuck!" Stan swore, "Get away!"

"Ah!" Trent smiled in delight, "two kills in one night"

Trent trained the pistol at Stan, only to have Alex step right in front of Stan.

"Get out the way, imbecile" Trent snapped

"No" Alex murmured, "I don't plan to"

"Fine, I'll just kill you first instead of second" Trent rolled his eyes

"No!" Stan screamed, getting splattered with Alex's blood, watching her falter to the ground. Stan knelt down beside her, mortified.

"Fucking-" Alex choked, clutching her chest in pain "Asshole.."

"Move" Trent ordered, following Stan who had his hands on his head, walking to the beach.

"But-" Stan started

"But _what_?" Trent snapped

"Nothing, I have nothing to say" Stan turned and put his hands on his head

They walked briskly to the rocks where a boat awaited. Trent shoved Stan in the small of his back to make him walk the boat. Stan was shaking, sweating and chattering his teeth from the cold night air that mysteriously overtook the normal humid air. They climbed onto the boat and Trent drove it out to sea where the land was only a faint smear.

"It was YOUR idea to start a fire" Trent said, "So your death will be the most grim"

Stan looked around him, taking in the icy blue ocean that once forever invited them in the clear and glossy ocean with forever perfectly curling waves.

Now it was a choppy bold and ominous dark shade of blue where the bottom was nowhere to be seen. It was an overcast day and that made the ocean look that much more brown than blue.

"Stan" Trent spoke calmly, "sit there"

Stan walked slowly to the side of the boat and sat. Watching something encircle the boat with purpose. Trent trained the gun to his forehead, smiling his wide toothy grin.

"Your time ends here" Trent purred

Stan looked up at the assailant one last time. Stan's heart beating in his throat and sweat beaded down his face.

"Oh look you just peed yourself!" Trent laughed, pointing at Stan's crotch. Sure enough, Stan had just peed himself.

"Well, of course, I've fucking pissed myself! You have a gun at my head!" Stan snapped.

A helicopter arrived and hovered above them, causing Stan to look up in wonderment. Blinded by a searchlight shining on the duo.

"Are you scared?" Someone asked using a megaphone, from the helicopter

"YES!" Stan screamed, shaking as he whitened in fear

"That's good! Because you're on _Yes I was Scared!_" the man laughed

Stan blinked and stared at Trent who holstered his gun "Jesus Christ, dude!"

"Look!" Trent pointed behind Stan, "Look at those cameras!"

Suddenly about ten speedboats roared towards them. Some of them had passengers with boom microphones and cameras. Other boats had applauding onlookers smiling and clapping.

"Aw" Stan gripped his nose bridge, "Aww, week!"

"I got you good" Trent laughed, "so good"

"Wait, my friends were acting?" Stan stared

"No they were real" Trent shrugged

"My friends are dead!?" Stan screamed, angry

"Hey, kid" Trent put a hand on Stan's shoulder, "If I wanted to kill you. I would've done it by now"

"You traumatized me!" Stan swiped his hand off, "You animalistic bastard!"

"Hey don't scream at _me_" Trent laughed as another boat motored towards them, containing all of his friends who were formerly dead.

"I put you up to this!" Wendy laughed, waving, bandaged arm and bruises

"I told you this was a bad idea" Sam muttered from a wheelchair

"Tune in next week!" the man on the megaphone trilled, "For a haunted Christmas special!"

"Fuck" Stan muttered

THE END


	6. Six: Epilogue

Stan looked at his friends. They all sported injuries from there supposed deaths. Sam was never going to walk again, yet he sacrificed that for a _stupid_ show, Wendy let herself get pegged off first, Alex genuinely looked traumatized and lost that Kyle was gone. Bebe was probably convinced she was inhaling carbon monoxide, not sleeping gas.

"We fooled your friends!" the man in the helicopter laughed

News reporters leapt onto the boat, stuffed a microphone at Sam's face.

"Sam, when did you know that this was a television show?" the reported laughed

Sam stared at the reported, unhappy, nobody on their boat looked happy. Everyone was shaken from the recent news.

"Uh" Sam looked down, "Until someone appeared with a camera and dragged me out the fire"

"Tell the world" the reported brandished his microphone, "C'mon, boy!"

"Leave him alone" Kyle shoved the reporter

"Just one question" the reporter said

"I didn't know this was a show" Sam admitted, "Nobody did. If I had known that if you booked a room in that hotel, people would film you witness your friends get murdered for sick entertainment. I would not have set foot here"

"I booked the hotel rooms" Wendy was tearful, "But I never knew _this_ would happen! I didn't know some sick minded fuck would pull such a prank like this and air it on international TV!"

"Sam isn't ever going to walk again!" Alex snatched the microphone, glaring at the cameramen filming them on another boat, "These injuries are real! I don't care that you tried to help us back to life! I don't fucking care that you said it was only a show! You traumatized my friends and I and hurt us!"

Stan grabbed the gun off of Trent who jumped in fright; He slowly trained it onto Trent. Trent widened his eyes in horror, backing away.

"How can you be okay with this?" Stan growled, walking forwards

"I did it for the money! I was the only one who knew about this! I thought it would be okay since the minute you 'died' you would get medical treatment!"

"You're a sick bastard" Stan growled, "You have done enough"

Stan depressed the trigger, watching Trent fly off his feet in an explosion of bright red blood. Head bucking backwards, he toppled overboard and into the shark infested waters below. Trent resurfaced and let put a piercing scream as a shark ripped him to shreds.

-ze flashback-

_Alex coughed, struggling to her knees. She started to cry, clutching the bloody wound that seeped blood. _

_"Alex!" Kyle ran towards her, "it's a show!"_

_Alex stared at a whole film crew running after Stan and Trent, hiding in nooks and crannies to avoid being seen. She saw a medical team run towards her, Kyle knelt beside her. She lay down, watching as the medical team worked on her, unsure why she could see Bebe with an oxygen tank, Wendy in head and chest bandages, Sam in a wheelchair, Kenny with a neck brace, Kyle in chest bandages and Cartman in a head bandage. _

_"It's just a show?" Alex shivered, "All of this was a sick prank?"_

_"Yeah" Wendy whispered, "It's how the hotel gets money. They let unwitting customers get filmed and murdered for television"_

_- ze present day-_

Stan slowly moved to the boat where his friends were, embraced by words of reassurance and relief.

"Lets get the fuck out of here" Stan said, "And never come back"

They revved the boat and motored away, leaving the camera crew and audience to stare in disbelief, standing in their own speedboats, jaws agape.

"Hey" Kenny picked up a beer bottle, "I just discovered a new way to asphyxiate myself!"


End file.
